I tested positive for Group B Strep which meant that I needed antibiotics while giving birth. I believe it is because of the antibiotics that my baby Tyler and I contracted thrush.

Tyler contracted oral thrush, which then transferred to my nipples. I remember the first night trying to feed and he just sucked and sucked and sucked, so much so that my nipples were bleeding and extremely painful. The midwife showed me a few different holds so I did a variation of them all to try and find a position that worked best. Having the thrush in my nipples caused the most excruciating pain and I was in tears every time I had to feed my baby. I would wiggle my toes and try to think 'happy' thoughts until the let down happened, at which stage the pain would be reduced. My boobs would hurt even when I wasn’t feeding Tyler so it made holding and cuddling him really hard. We got rid of the thrush after about eight weeks using several doses of Daktarin Oral Gel, as we kept giving it back to each other.

After the thrush had been treated, I was still having problems with bleeding and scabby nipples so I went to the Karitane Family Centre in Johnsonville and sat there for three mornings so they could watch me feed him. This was really great and they gave me a lot of useful advice. I was lucky enough that one of the nurses actually came to my house (they are not supposed to but I was desperate) and saw the chair I was sitting in and the feeding pillow I was using. It turned out that the pillow I was using was too high for me so the positioning was all wrong which meant Tylerwas not feeding correctly. After this was corrected things became so much better. The scabs cleared up, the pain went away and he fed much quicker too! It really helps if
someone can come to your home environment and see how you are doing things!

This all happened over the space of about three months. At eight weeks I had
gone and bought bottles and formula and tried to give him some but he wouldn't drink out of a bottle. His screaming was too much to bear so the bottles went back in the cupboard. I tried expressing with an electric pump but this was more painful than feeding him directly.

Once all the problems had gone away I managed to feed Tyler until he was 14 months old. We probably would have gone on a bit longer but I got pregnant with my second son when he was 10 months old and I believe the taste of the milk changed and he decided he didn't want it anymore. And I did not want to be feeding a newborn and a toddler! As it was my left boob was always a bit slow to make milk so he weaned off this boob at about 11 months and just fed off my right boob for the rest of the time. Hence one is now much bigger than the other!

My second son Jayden was born with a hiss and a roar when Tyler was nearly 19 months old. Besides the initial scabs and sore boobs, things have gone much smoother without any problems. It did still hurt for the first few months but nothing like the pain I had with Tyler. He is now nine months old and still enjoys having his 'boobies'! He has only bitten me once and after being told off has not done it again.

I found breast feeding pure hell with Connor, a massive baby 9lb 10oz. I had a very traumatic labour resulting in a caesarean section. I had no milk for about three days and Connor was jaundiced, so he had to go under lamps and be fed formula from a cup. I tried to express in the hospital but after about 30mins I only had about 1ml of colostrum which he spat out. I was pretty disappointed after putting in such an effort to express, but was so tired at the time it was mildly funny and ironic that he didn't even like it in the first place.

I then started a trip to breastfeeding hell. It was incredibly painful, despite being told he was latched on correctly and my nipples were fine. He had thrush for the first three months of his life and was given medication for it which didn't really clear it up. Thrush makes breast feeding incredibly painful - like razor blades being sucked out. Connor’s tongue was covered in thick white stuff so I it was probably annoying for him as well. I would wake in the night, bawling at the thought of the pain I would go through the next day and then, during the day, would try to find other things that urgently needed doing first. I ended up hiring a breast pump from the hospital at three weeks, expressing and feeding it to him in a bottle, which made us both happier.

This worked until I really wasn't keeping up with his hunger, so at six weeks I gave up - guiltily - and switched to a bottle. He was on the maximum amount of formula, and eventually went on to the hungry baby formula as he was starving.

I maintain that I probably had thrush in my nipples which was never treated hence, the pain - and he was a big hungry boy. I’m not sure why I wasn’t treated when Connor was treated, I guess I had bad doctor and I hadn't really mentioned the pain that I was feeling either. Connor was so happy on the bottle, and so was I. He had to start solids at four months and has been a happy healthy lad since, so I feel I probably made the best decision at the time.

When I had my second son I decided to give breastfeeding a go again, but to not beat myself up too much if it didn't work. I managed three months of breastfeeding with Harrison. I was proud and pleased that it was easier this time. I had bought about five books over the internet from Amazon about breastfeeding and what to do when you can't - they were all very helpful books and I used to go to them for trouble shooting if I came up against a problem. He was a great wee feeder and I couldn't even feel him when he was latched on. He would sometimes go five hours between feeds. He chucked up a lot of it, but seemed happy (he wasn't that interested in food and is only seeing its benefits now at 19 months). However at about three months he started fussing and crying and was generally unsettled. He lost interest in the breast and stopped gaining weight. So I expressed for a few weeks again and he seemed happier taking my breastmilk from the bottle. I then gave up as it was hard work expressing, feeding, cleaning and dealing with a toddler (the boys are 21months apart in age). One good thing was having lots of help and getting out with friends as we all looked after each others kids a bit - so they could deal with Connor at the park etc whilst I was trying to breastfeed Harrison. I think expressing and feeding probably took no longer as he was quicker on a bottle. I deliberated a lot about stopping and talked to Alex (hubby) and he said it was my decision in the long run. He felt breast milk was better but not if it was getting difficult for me. I had to be very organized, expressing and taking bottles out - luckily my background in teaching helped with the organization!

I then found out Harrison had bad reflux, and he went on three types of medication. The reflux was the reason why the bottle feeding was making him more comfortable as he was in an upright position, whereas on the breast he was lying down. I changed him to formula but I don't think the cows milk really agreed with him as the chucking up didn't stop until he was about one. I actually do regret stopping breast feeding Harrison, but by the time we had worked all this out it was too late to get my milk back.

I was lucky to have very supportive friends - 90% of whom were very successful breastfeeders, but who all supported my decision and said I had done what was best for us at the time.

I did wish that there was a baby bottle that said 'this is my mummy's milk' when I was expressing as when Connor was really young I did a few judgemental looks.

I am looking forward to the challenge of breastfeeding number three, and feel more positive than I did before Harrison was born. I think, at the end of the day, sod everyone and do what makes you and your baby happy. In the end we are probably the formula fed generation and all turned out fine - so far! Both my kids are healthy now and haven't suffered the ear infections, etc; they say you get from bottle feeding.

I think breastfeeding is the hardest thing in the world to get the hang of, as it always looks so easy when people do it in public. All of my friends who have had kids after me, and have asked for advice before their birth, I have told that breast feeding is the hardest thing you will ever do. Be prepared for a challenge and if it doesn't work don't worry - they make formula for a reason, so use it if you have to.

I have two children and right from the start had every intention of breastfeeding. I made sure while in hospital with my first that I had every latch checked by a midwife until I felt confident enough that things were going well. I was still sore for about six weeks but continued to feed Holly until I found out I was pregnant again when she was just over 12 months old.

I therefore did the same again with my second as although I felt like an old hand at it I still needed the reassurance that I was doing things properly. I had my latch checked again frequently both in hospital and when the midwife visited at home and though Josie was a natural I could not understand why I was in so much pain.

My midwife left me a breastfeeding DVD to watch - which I did religiously - pausing it when I was feeding to try and mirror what was going on on-screen but still I had terrible toe-curling pain and could not see what on earth I was doing wrong. I found this incredibly upsetting and frustrating as I wanted to give my second child the same start in life as my first and though I had no intention of giving up, I could not bear the thought of suffering like this for 12 months.

Finally a week later I went to see a Plunket lactation consultant, the morning of which my midwife rang and suggested I may have thrush on my nipples. Sure enough this was confirmed by the consultant - the thrush had started in Josie's mouth when she had antibiotics at birth. Literally 12 hours later the cream and drops started to work and the pain started to subside. Although it took several weeks to shift completely, the treatment worked and the thrush didn't come back.

I remember reading some midwifery literature that was given to me about recognising breastfeeding problems which said as a general rule - if all else appears to be correct and there is still pain consider thrush as the problem. If you’re not sure what to look for, thrush in the mouth is shown by cottage cheese like white lumps on the insides of the cheeks and not easily scraped away. Not to be confused with just simple white "stains" on the tongue from feeding which is normal. Further signs on the breast are red dots around the nipples which will spread with the severity. To get rid of it completely both the mouth and the nipples must be treated with drops and cream accordingly otherwise it will just simply keep passing back from one to the other. Thrush in the mouth is not painful for the baby just a bit of an irritation and they may try and use breastfeeding as a way of scratching the itchy bits!

I would love to be in a position to pass this on to every new breastfeeding mother who thinks they are doing everything by the book but is still in pain. I am very grateful to the Plunket lactation consultant in Dunedin who did not treat me as a wimp but as someone in genuine pain who needed a bit of sympathy! General symptoms of thrush were sharp pain like broken glass on the nipples during feeding and stabbing pains in the breast between feeds.

The breast infection which followed at six weeks wasn't great either - flu-like symptoms - but these were quickly cleared up with antibiotics and I am still feeding Josie at nearly eight months with no issues at all.

All the books made it seem easy. At antenatal class with a doll it seemed easy. So why wasn't breastfeeding easy? I wish I was more prepared for the realities of breastfeeding when my gorgeous little boy was born.

In the first few days, despite being totally exhausted and suffering post birth pains breastfeeding appeared to be going well. The midwives also seemed to indicate that things looked good. Yes, there was a little discomfort when he initially latched on, but he was feeding well and I was loving it.

It wasn't until I got home that things went downhill and fast. Breastfeeding became excruciating! And I mean excruciating! In some ways it was worse than child birth. I would dread him waking for a feed. Crying and shaking, I struggled through each feed. At one point I even had thoughts of throwing my beautiful boy across the room! It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it.
I had cracks on both my nipples. But my midwife couldn't understand why I was finding breastfeeding so painful. They weren't bleeding, so I must have just been exaggerating.

If I wanted to continue breastfeeding, I needed help and fast. I called Plunket, the midwives at birth care, and the La Leche League. All were so lovely and all had different advice. The lactation consultant at La Leche was probably the most helpful. After a lengthy discussion we worked out that my little man was "gumming" me. He wouldn't pull his top lip out, hence the nipple cracks. Then there was the suggestion that I could have thrush. I had suffered with thrush throughout my pregnancy, but thought I was rid of it. I had no signs of it "down there" and no obvious signs on my nipples or in his mouth, so how could that be? After much research I discovered that diagnosing nipple thrush can be very difficult. Sometimes the only obvious symptom is extreme nipple sensitivity. The water from a shower on my nipples was even painful.

I do my best to avoid drugs at all cost, but knew that if I wanted to continue breastfeeding I needed to get rid of the thrush and fast. So I started applying a broad spectrum anti fungal to my nipples and my little boy was treated with Nilstat oral drops.
Using nipple shields intermittently (which lessened the pain to a point that was just bearable) I managed to continue breastfeeding. I was scared that if I expressed I would deplete my milk supply and was even told that the use of nipple shields could do the same, but I was desperate. I kept thinking that it was better to deal with a slight decrease in milk supply later than to not breast feed at all and have even less milk.

I also sought help for the "gumming" issue as I didn't want the nipple cracks to get larger. That is where the lactation consultant at the Plunket family centre was so very helpful.

The pain decreased considerably within a few days, which is also an indication that the treatment was working and that it was in fact thrush. But it took maybe 2 to 3 weeks before the nipple cracks healed.

My little man is now 8 months old and I am still breast feeding. I am so glad I sought help and am extremely grateful to everyone for their support through such a trying time. I just wish I was given all the facts at the start and that I was seen by a trained lactation consultant during those first few days post birth. So if you are struggling with breastfeeding and really wish to continue, please seek help and try not to give up. There are some great organisations out there. I would even boldly recommend that everyone wishing to breast feed sees a lactation consultant within the first week of giving birth, whether they are having difficulties or not. Those nipple cracks can appear so quickly.

Best of luck to all. Motherhood is such a joy.